In my role, I'll have to travel 2-3 times a year.

These work trips are hard on the family.

From not seeing the kids to my wife having to take on all the household responsibilities (while still working), it can be a lot.

Leaving for these trips without considering their impact on your family (or how you can support your partner) can lead to conflict, hurt feelings, and resentment.

I want to share some things that I do to prepare for work trips.

These ideas don’t make it easy to be gone, but they help a little bit.

Communicate with your partner

Acknowledge the challenges

One of the best things you can do with your partner is simply acknowledge that this is hard.

Saying “I know it’s hard to take care of the kids when I’m gone on these trips” can go a long way.

Give them time for themselves

In the days leading up to your trip, you could:

• encourage your partner to do something for themselves, like get massage, lunch with a friend, a trip of their own…something.
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• take on more of the household responsibilities than you normally do
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• watch the kids when they get up early in the morning so your partner can sleep in (since you will have the luxury of sleeping in uninterrupted for a few days)

Get help

Do whatever you can to provide support in while you’re gone.

Is there family in town that can help?

If not, do you have the means to fly them out like Mitch did?

Could you hire a babysitter to help? You can find some on websites like care.com.​

Could you pay to have them in school / daycare a little longer?

Communicate with your kids

Write them

My dad was deployed a lot when I was a kid. And those trips were a lot longer than a week.

The main thing I remember about those deployments was getting letters from him. Made me feel special.

Now whenever I leave, I write a message for each kid on a note card and put it somewhere I know they’ll find it within that first day. I just tell them I love them and miss them and that I’m looking forward to seeing them again soon.

My daughter still has the one I wrote her years ago sitting on her night stand.

One of my colleagues takes this to the next level and sets up a scavenger hunt for his kids to do when he’s gone.

Spend time with them before you go

This doesn’t have to be an extravagant thing, but should be intentional, uninterrupted time with your kids.

Put the phone away and ask them what they want to do.

Play a board game, eat at your favorite smoothie spot, go to a concert - do something together.

Show them where you’re going

Point out where you’re going on a map. It gives them a sense of where you actually are.

When you’re gone…

Make time to check in

Text and ask how things are going.

Send pictures showing what you’re up to.

Figure out when you can Facetime for a few minutes given your schedule and potential time zone shifts.

Or use an app like Marco Polo for asynchronous video chat. I often send my wife a tour of my hotel when I get there and she can watch it when she has a free moment.

Don’t forget the souvenirs

You don’t need to buy anything expensive - simple gifts that show you were thinking of them and also show a little bit of where you were at.

Thankfully, magnets are a hit for both my wife and kids.

And don’t wait until you get to the airport on your way home to start looking. I did that and ended up not being able to find Audrey a little potato plushy I promised her from Boise, ID.

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These trips are hard on the family but a little intentionality and communication can make them a little easier for everyone.

Recommendation of the week:

​The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry​

When I read my first John Mark Comer, book I picked up about 3 more of his and read them pretty quickly.

This one explores how hurrying not only makes us anxious and stressed, it’s slowly destroying our souls.

It comes from a Christian perspective and how hurry keeps you from being able to truly connect with and experience God’s love. It also makes you a less pleasant person.

As a WFH dad, I’ve noticed that the constant hurry in my life not only affects my work but also strains my relationship with my wife and kids.

This book offers insights on how to slow down and be more present.

What about you?

I’d love to hear how you prep for your work trips.

Or if you find them to be particularly challenging for your family.

Email me at thom@wfhdads.com and let me know. I read and respond to all of them.

Thanks again for being a part of this community!

Thom Gibson Founder of WFH Dads ​​​

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600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246
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